The transformation of me

{September 11, 2012}   You are good enough!

Hello friends,

I know, I know. It has been over a month since my last post. My friend had to ask me when I was going to post again.  Even though she asked I still felt unmotivated to write.  Well after church on Sunday, and after reading one of my friends post yesterday about some of her struggles I decided to post.  Just to let you guys know why I don’t post on a regular basis.  I have issues. There are to many to name right now but I will discuss a few.  One of my major problems is a lack of focus, this is the root of many of my other issues as well. You see, I have many ideas, I am a dreamer, and I have goals. There is so much that I want to do with my life, but because I lack focus there isn’t much that I have accomplished in my 33 years. I have started many new things, only to not finish them.  You see I want so much for myself and my family but because I have failed to finish the things that I have started I am afraid.  Now fear is crippling me and causing me to second guess what God has created me to do. Coming to the realization of this has caused  me to have several emotional break downs, as a matter of fact I have to stop typing every so often so that I can stop crying and regain my composure.  You see I am such a positive and motivating person. I can motivate friends, family and even complete strangers, but I just feel empty most of the time.  I feel like there is only one person that I can truly talk to about my short comings and that is because this person has NEVER made me feel like I was in adequate. Thank you Mom, for never judging and always showing love, you are awesome! I have to get out of this rut, I cannot let this consume me.  Feeling inadequate is one of my other issues.  I think that it stems back to my childhood, wanting the love of my father but never  truly having it because he loved drugs more than anything else in this world.  I loved him as much as any child loves their father but I was never good enough, and as I got older he made sure that I knew it.  I am really digging deep to unearth some deep rooted issues and it hurts SO bad to face the truth, I just can’t stop crying.  Enough with this pity party, I can’t let this send me into a depression.  Dealing with my problems is the first step to fixing them.

Thank you to my pastor who’s sermon this Sunday was ” You are good enough”.  Awesome message and service by the way.  So even though, I am my biggest critic I am determined to change, for my sake, and for my family sake.  I refuse to stay the same.  I know that I am destined to be great and I will be.  I am taking small steps to overcome my issues, and there is a grocery list full of them, but one at a time.  I would love for the world to see me as God made me but I won’t live my life to satisfy others.  

Motivation moment:

Know that you are good enough. You were wonderfully made and there is nothing that anyone can say or do to change that.  You are beautiful, you are smart, you are enough! There is nothing wrong with being you. Get healthy, and be happy with who you are on the inside, and those who truly matter will love that person as well. We can always be better, but do it because that’s what you want for yourself. Remember “you is smart, you is kind, you is important!”





Be beautiful inside and out.


{August 2, 2012}   Zumba and friends!

Good morning all! I know that it has been a while since I have truly written in my blog, but it has been hard breaking thru this funk that I have been going thru over the last couple of months. I mean I was so motivated when I started this blog back in April. I was ready to just push myself to do the best that I could to lose this weight. I can’t even call it baby weight anymore because my baby will be a year old soon and I have yet to make it down to my pre baby weight. I have made some strides, but I am still disappointed in my laziness and lack of motivation. I mean just looking in the mirror should alone should push me to work out daily. Don’t get me wrong, I am not unhappy with myself but I am unhappy with my body. The thing is, I know that I can do it, normally when I have a goal in mind nothing can stop me from accomplishing it but it just seems so much harder to do now. I want to by any means necessary mentality again. I have realized that in the journey I just have to make time for me. I have two beautiful children and great husband, and I try to give them my time and energy. The thing is as I take care of them and their needs, but mine often get over looked. So I have decided to make me a priority! I know that it is going to be hard but I have to do it!

Anyhow, enough of my morning rant. I have a really good friend who has encouraged me to join a Zumba class with her at W.O.W fitness (war on weight). I have done Zumba a few other places and it was cool, but I think that I have found the place for me now. For $20 a month I have access to unlimited Zumba classes 5 days a week, and even though I have only done 2 classes ( which kicked my butt ) I loved every minute of it. The women/owners of the WOW fitness are very encouraging, as well as the participants of the class. The first day I thought I was going to die when I got home, but I felt better after a good night sleep. The second day, wasn’t as bad. I was completely soaked in sweat after the class, so I am looking forward to getting such an awesome workout on a regular basis. So my friend and I are both ex-military and she has been an awesome motivator, I see now she is not going to let me do anything less than 100%. Shout out to Key Fletcher, and thanks to everyone who comment on my posts and offer motivation, it is greatly appreciated! I hope to update you a couple of times a week with my workout progress. Anyone looking for a place to workout, try W.O.W. fitness they even offer free insanity classes twice a week, can beat that!

Motivational moment;

Sometime we mess up and get out of our healthy eating and workout routines, but don’t give up! As long as you have breath in your lungs you can start again. Make today the day you start over. Don’t say Monday I will do better, there is not better day than today to make a change in your life.

Every Accomplishment starts with a Decision to Try.

Another chance. #fitfluential

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Stay motivated!


et cetera
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